That certainly explains a few things.
For example, remember that time that you were using our family computer for cheating websites and porn? I do.
Do you remember your response when I told you that I had found your cheating profiles and your apparent preference for virtual women and the unique kind of entertainment they provide instead of me, your wife? I do.
After I told you that I had found your extramarital activities, in my own home no less (desktop in our family room), you looked at me with that angry red face of yours and in all sincerity said, “stay off the Internet.”
That was not what I was expecting. I was expecting something like, I’m so sorry, that was wrong of me and I will never do it again.
Funny freaky Narcissists, can’t live with them.
I know, that’s an awkward sentence above. It sounds unfinished but it’s not. I said exactly what I meant.
Serial adultery, pornography, one night stands, hookups, affairs, all very exciting for you. Unfortunately for me, the word devastating comes to mind. Oh, and nauseating, that word too.
Mr. Cavalier man, no remorse, just anger that the wife had discovered your secret life. You weren’t even ashamed or embarrassed. What’s up with that?
Our family computer history should have been rated XXX! I saw things that to this day I can’t get out of my head. I had no idea what was available via the Internet.
I’m sorry, I suddenly feel sick, gotta go.
P.S. I will always miss the original misconception that I had of you, the man I thought I married.
May 26, 2016 at 10:46 pm
Because the subject matter is…well, no laughing matter…I won’t laugh. OK…nevermind…this made me LOL. Until the last little cartoon. That just makes me sad. Narcissist are generally very intelligent people…what is so ironic is how stupid they really are and how stupid they truly believe everyone else around them is. You are right..can’t live with them…
May 27, 2016 at 12:55 am
Somehow, looking back on many of the painful things he said and did do the same thing to me. How ludicrous to say “stay off the Internet” but I could never forget his exact words and in that moment I was both shocked and hurt. But when I write about it, if it wasn’t me, I might not even believe it, but it’s the absolute truth.
He also said, “it’s just a couple of girls giving b… jobs” about that particular porn viewing event, but I figured that was a little too much information.
My reply was, “should I lysol the desk and the chair?”
His answer, “probly.”
Yes, he can successfully troll the Internet but he always leaves out the middle syllable in probably.
Stupid moron perv.
Uh oh, did I say that outloud?
May 27, 2016 at 11:40 pm
BWAHAHAHA!!!!!
May 26, 2016 at 11:00 pm
So, yes, humour can be used. I love the picture of the nurse. I agree with Kay, the last picture made me sad. It is sad…indeed can’t live with them. You deserve better.
May 27, 2016 at 12:26 am
You are right! Can’t live with them… only devastation to be had. Take care and be well. Sorry for your pain. 💜
May 27, 2016 at 11:46 am
I let my ex know he was busted by leaving the receipt for the flowers he had sent her, along with her pic that I printed from his desktop, on my desk where he would see them. I giggled when he went storming out of the house. I waited about a half hour then texted him “I’m a bit confused as to why YOU would be angry right now”. A highlight in an otherwise bleak time. thanks for sharing!
May 27, 2016 at 3:45 pm
You’re welcome. That’s a good one, made me giggle too.
May 27, 2016 at 12:23 pm
When I first confronted Loser about his infidelity….he said “get over it.” When I confronted him about giving me an incurable STD, he called me a fucking bitch. Years later, after having obviously being prompted by that WTC, he tried to reduce me to her status by saying “you could have gotten it from anybody.”
“Stay off the internet?” Are you fucking kidding me? I don’t think YOU’RE the one who should stay off the internet!
May 27, 2016 at 3:53 pm
If you catch them doing wrong you are in trouble, nature of the narcissistic beast. I’ve heard “get over it,” but what he meant by that was don’t talk about it, forget about it, leave me alone, pretend it didn’t happen or you will be sorry, etc.
Yep f b, one of his favorite nicknames, also crazy f b, and now I’m Bipolar, he must have learned that word about 2 years ago because he uses that in his smear campaign.
Apparently it enhances his victim status when he’s wanting to make new friends, especially with the ladies, poor baby.
May 27, 2016 at 5:24 pm
I know….Loser is so pitiful…6’3″ tall, and weigh 250….and I”M such a brute…all 98 pounds of me…he’s afraid (again after being prompted by that WTC) that I’m going to shoot him. Wah….
May 28, 2016 at 12:54 am
I wish I could make my narc fear me.
Oh, he does, I’ve exposed him for being a narc. Narcs have a closet full of skeletons, he should fear me.
Keep them guessing, they should be uncomfortable considering the path of destruction they leave behind.
May 28, 2016 at 11:02 am
Mine was deathly afraid that the divorce papers would get “splattered all over Facebook.” Hmmmm….guess what?
May 28, 2016 at 1:21 pm
Tee hee hee……sometimes Karma needs a gentle nudge, sometimes she needs a shove.
May 28, 2016 at 1:22 pm
Yeah, and I don’t think she’s through “shoving.” LOL
May 28, 2016 at 1:13 pm
His reaction. Reminds me again why I am not with my ex. He did this to me ALL the time. It shakes you to the core. It’s our fault all of a sudden. It’s awful and I’m sorry you lived/live it. It chips away at our health. Emotional and physical.
June 13, 2016 at 4:01 pm
I can’t yet write about my own story on my public blog, but your blog is really helping me. Thank you. Trying to divorce a narc after 25 years, dealing with rage, blameshifting, projection, hoovering–it’s TOUGH. Because the love is still there, it didn’t die when he decided he “fell in love” with someone he’d only known for a handful of weeks and wanted me to try “polyamory” so he could figure out who he really loved. Worth giving it all up for, yup. Devalue, discard. Ripped and stomped upon heart. I live it every day.
June 14, 2016 at 1:12 am
I’m sorry that you too have experienced the indescribable cruelty of loving, marrying and planning your entire future with a narcissist. Like me, you love who you thought you married, the illusion of a caring, loving human being. Like me you now know the truth but can’t accept it because it’s not your truth, it’s theirs. Your truth is/was love. Unlike the fake narcissistic creature we can’t stop feeling what for us was very real and a top priority, our love and our marriage. I’ve known the truth for over 5 years, but I have yet to be able to stop loving the mask. He was everything I had ever wanted, perfect for me, and then he was a stranger, a cruel and unrecognizable monster, but I guess I still see the mask, I love the mask. I wish he would come back, that perfect man who he pretended to be, I miss him. I hate who he became, or revealed I should say, the cruel creature behind the mask.
It’s just so hard to process that our entire twenty+ years together was a lie, how do you process that? I try every day and I fail miserably, every single day.
So much rage, I was duped, used, abused and the final insult was the smear campaign.
According to Dr. Pantsonfire I was just plain crazy but he has since updated my diagnosis to Bipolar. He learned that word recently. I would embrace being Bipolar, if I was, but he is using the term as a weapon in his psychological warfare to discredit me due to the fact that I have the key to the closet where his skeletons are stored, so many skeletons.
June 15, 2016 at 4:10 am
Today when I saw him so I could give him his mail and he wanted to take me out for lunch and we walked on the beach, he told me he “needed” to see me because it “sustains” him and a lightbulb went off in my head that all he does is use me and it’s always all about him and I’m drained of my own lifeforce because I’ve always given it to him. So I told him that I felt he was using me and perhaps he shouldn’t see me any more. (I mean, if that PERSON he “fell in love” with can’t sustain him, why did he betray ME?) Thank you so much for sharing your pain with me. Yes, so hard to process how 25 years could be discarded in the blink of an eye for someone he only knew a handful of weeks. He said WE have a rich, beautiful, deep love. I think he doesn’t know what that means or he wouldn’t have betrayed that love.
June 15, 2016 at 4:50 am
Sorry, yes, they use us. Keep us close just in case they need us for something, sometimes just to watch us suffer because it is ego fuel to know that they have that power and control. It will never get any better, it will probably worse if you spend time with him, he will continue to use and abuse you, it’s what they do.
Mine told me that I was his “soul mate.” I don’t believe in soul mates but I thought, how sweet.
I will never know how many “soul mates” he had during our many years of marriage, not to mention pickups, hookups, one night stands and hookers. He probably couldn’t even figure it out, so many soul mates, so little brain cell activity, alcohol will do that.
I make myself think of him as a monster, because he is. I sometimes think of a shark, or a parasite (leach, worm, tick, fungus) because he is.
You’re right, they don’t love, they use. You got the goods, they be in love.
Parasite, picture ugly parasite.
I made a distorted pic of my nex, he’s not so hot anymore. Thank you photo editor, good job!
June 15, 2016 at 2:31 pm
We were soul mates until he found another one (he told me THEY were soul mates too) Yes, monster, leech, parasite. You have helped me so much. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. There is a huge hole in my heart but good people like you are helping to fill it. x
June 19, 2016 at 1:55 pm
M shocked…. N sad…the humour is visible but the essence is still sad…kudos to u writing so brilliantly
June 19, 2016 at 3:03 pm
Thank you.
June 23, 2016 at 11:25 pm
Reblogged this on rookie advice and commented:
Interesting, and sad experience of narcissistic abuse. Worth a read. It’s good to have some knowledge on red flags to save yourself from a potentially harmful situation.
July 14, 2016 at 8:59 am
Reblogged this on Marilyn Munrow and commented:
Heehee love it sugar
July 18, 2016 at 7:03 pm
Thank you. I’ve been away and unable to respond or write. I’m glad you liked it.
July 18, 2016 at 7:03 pm
Loved it sugar. So to the point
July 18, 2016 at 7:06 pm
Unfortunately you are right.
July 18, 2016 at 7:07 pm
Glad to have you back
July 18, 2016 at 7:13 pm
Thank you.
October 5, 2016 at 10:14 pm
I love your writing, I can so. relate
November 9, 2017 at 8:41 pm
I’ve been away for a while, I’m sorry that it took so long to get back to you.
Thank you so much and I’m sorry… that you can so relate.
October 5, 2016 at 10:15 pm
Sorry I hit send before I completed my thought. Great blog.❤
January 8, 2018 at 7:41 am
Great blog! I love the way you write but it makes me sad by all you’ve experienced because I experienced similar situations as well. Mine was into porn too and traveled for work so I’m sure there’s much I didn’t know nor do I care to know now that we’re divorced.I hope you find peace and can get away from him.
February 18, 2018 at 11:44 pm
Thank you.